wasn't me.

He was supposed to be sleeping...

...instead he was tearing the place apart. Busted!

Prelude to a tantrum

Much like learning to distinguish between your newborn's cries, learning to 'read' your toddlers non-verbal cues is an essential skill for preventing monster meltdowns. I've learned to pay attention to Liam's expressions, they say it all...

"This sucks, pay attention to me"

"This sucks, get out of my face"

And my personal favorite: "aww mom, you're a bitch!"

Double trouble.

I'm the kind of mom that doesn't really care if her kid drinks juice on the couch or runs around sans diaper and wees accidentally on the floor. I didn't always take this approach to parenting but once Liam became mobile I found it exhausting (not to mention annoying) to try and micro-mother him. When little accidents happen I just clean it up. The 15 minutes of peace I get from not chasing him around nagging is totally worth the 15 minutes it will take to clean the pee out of the rug.

Its All About Balance.

So naturally when I presented Liam with crayons and a coloring book at the kitchen table I didn't pay any mind when he climbed off the chair and toddled off crayons in tow.

On this particular day Chris was outside mowing the lawn. I was in the kitchen making a batch of mac & cheese cupcakes.

It should be noted that when I am cooking I spend a good amount of time shooing Liam out from under my feet so when he's quietly playing in the other room-well, I don't go looking for trouble.

The next thing I know Chris is standing at the fridge looking at me in disbelief as he asks: " Do you know what your son is doing?" Quickly noting that he is not at the table I reply "Judging from the look on your face I assume he is drawing on something you disapprove of."

I was not wrong.

I can say, for the record, that crayola washables are, indeed, washable.

Mired in Stalemate.

Liam, now 19 months, is displaying all the endearing qualities of a caged hyena. When he gets frustrated (which is all the time!)he totally loses it. He'll bang his head on the wall or floor, shout, cry, kick his feet... you get the idea. I'd like to be able to say I have no idea where he gets it from. But that would be a lie. I'll admit he gets his temper from me. My fuse is so short you'll likely lose your hand just lighting it.
As penance I spend my waking hours simultaneously feigning a grin and taking deep breaths. See, Liam will not sit in grocery cart for more than 30 seconds, and the belt is useless, he can slip right out of it. Same thing with those nasty wooden high chairs all restaurants have. I have a sneaking suspicion that the brains behind that design were from a childless twenty-something male. Had a woman been assigned to that project the end result would be stylish and self-cleaning with a straight jacket style restraint to ensure your lovable little Houdini stays put until your finished eating your meal. Fine dining establishments might sport the "The Luxury Edition" A highchair fully enclosed in sound proof Plexiglass so that you aren't riddled with guilt over ruining every other diners experience.


I really miss dining out.

Anyway...

Here are a few fun things that happened today.

I'm watching a re-run of Greys on lifetime. Its the episode where Denny dies. I cant believe I'm watching it again because it was heart wrenching the first time. So we are at the part where the interns rush to Denny's room to find Izzy laying in the hospital bed with him. She's calm until her friends tell her they need to move him to the morgue, then she breaks down. And I'm sobbing right along with her. I'm sitting there folding the laundry crying at the TV when I hear a slight chuckle. I look over to see Liam staring squarely at me, laughing. HE IS LAUGHING AT ME! No lie.

I gave Liam a water bottle about a quarter full of water. He's at that phase where he wants to be a big boy and drink out of the same containers we do, without help. So I let him, you know, every once in a while. Its what a good mother does right? I'm supporting his independence. So he's traipsing around the dining room holding that water bottle practically parallel to the ground but so what. Its only water. Then I hear: splat, splash, trickle, drip. I look over and he's dumping the water onto the power supply cord to my laptop. I race over yelling, NO, LIAM, NO. CRAP! I take the bottle from him, and shoo him into the other room. He's looking back at me as he toddles off. As I attempt to unplug the cord sitting in a puddle of water I assume he's out of earshot and I drop an F bomb under my breath. No sooner does that word leave my lips and Liam is right next to me, shaking his hands in front of him in mock frustration. And then he says it, just as I did. Somewhere between a groan and a whisper: "Faaah." Nice mommy, nice.

I had to pick up a few things at the market so I put Liam in the cart and gave him a dumb dumb lollipop. But Liam doesn't just lick the lollipop, he makes love to it. He wont just keep in in his mouth he's got to take it out every few seconds and handle it. He sticks in on his arm, neck, cheek and then he takes it one step too far and puts it in his hair. It gets stuck. We are in the store, I'm trying to pick out a proper pineapple and Liam has a lollipop stuck to his head. Whats worse is that this totally pisses him off. So he pitches the mother of all fits because he was really enjoying that lollipop and now... not so much.

I had just finished cleaning up the kitchen from dinner, Liam was playing with the farm magnets on the fridge and making cow sounds over and over. I glanced at the clock and was surprised to see that it was already 8:00 pm, so I casually said "wow Liam, its already bedtime." Without missing a beat he put the magnets back on the fridge and headed for the stairs saying "nigh-nigh." This is the first time he had said "nite-nite" to me and I was overjoyed! Not only because he's using a new word but because he listened to what I said and responded. Amazing.


That, right there, makes all the other struggles, SO worth it.

Buying the stairway to a new CD

In 1991 when I was a freshman in high school my parents joined the Columbia House Music Club. They had some new membership deal wherein you buy one selection of your choice and then you get to pick out ten more for just a penny each, plus shipping and handling. My parents intended to expand their classical music collection but I had other ideas. I was tired of having to record my favorite songs off of the radio. On any given night I'd be sitting in my room writing in my journal or cutting out magazine pictures of Andre Agassi or Joe Montana when I would hear the first few notes of a song like Stairway, or fade to black; I would leap from my bed and run to my dual cassette player to press both the record and play buttons simultaneously. The end result was a mix tape full of my favorite songs, all without the opening bars.
So when my parents agreed (after badgering them, almost to their deaths) to me picking out 3 albums I knew they had to be BIG ONES. Ones that I would both enjoy and win "cool points" for should anyone see me loading them into my sony walkman. the yellow one.
After pouring over the Columbia house music catalog for hours I had finally made my selections: Led Zeppelin Four, The Doors Greatest Hits and Rolling Stones Flashpoint. Add them to my Michael Jackson, Madonna and Fine Young Cannibals cassettes and I had quite an eclectic collection.

Relevant Sidebar: Cindy and I actually arranged to buy eachother the FYC tape for Christmas the year before. We both wrapped and put pretty bows on it and when the exchange took place in my kitchen we squealed and hugged each other with an excitement only two silly girls can have on such an occasion. I loved her like the best part of myself. And deep down, though we are on separate coasts and separated by a distance time often delivers, I still do.

Through the years my collection grew and grew and over time with the introduction of the CD, cassettes became obsolete. So then it was barely noticed when one was broken or lost in a move. However, one of the original three managed to stick with me, until today.


Today I say goodbye to my Led Zeppelin Four cassette. The last of its kind. Although the hour of entertainment that old thing gave my boy made it so much less bitter than sweet.

Going Comando

Nothing much new to report on the home front. I'm closing in on my last few weeks of working a routine schedule until the fall (sad!) and we are gearing up for our summer vacation to NY in two weeks. I'm stock piling travel toys in dreaded preparation for the 16 hour trip. We are breaking it up, theres no two ways about that. First we will spend a few days in Rhinebeck visiting Chris's side of the family and then on up to the Adirondacks to visit with my side. I'm particularly excited to get back to the ADKs because its been something like 8 years since I was last up there. Growing up we used to go several times a year, I can imagine it will feel like a homecoming. Once our car crosses over into familiar territory I'll begin to feel the butterflies of excited anticipation. I love that. I'll get to point out personal landmarks to Chris: "When Cindy and I were 16 we hitchhiked this road home from the bog with boys we had just met. And there is the bar where my sister, Leslie, and I hustled some trash talking Foosball players for a round of beers. Over there, on that corner was Mandy's Moldy Maggot Market, a little penny candy store we used to raid for tootsie pops and Charleston chews that had been sitting on the self since Nixon was in office. And there! There is the campground where our whole family, cousins, aunts, uncles and all set up the Hodge-Mitchell compound and camped every summer I was in high school. And this, this is the lake. The lake where, the last time I was here, I lay on a blanket with my sister, Kimmy, under the stars and watched the Northern Lights."

Liam will be meeting a legion of family members for the first time, his aunt, uncle and cousins in Rhinebeck and then my aunt, cousins and second cousins upstate. Just in time to make a lasting first impression Liam has a new party trick; he's learned how to take his diaper off! The implications of this are manifold. So far we have managed to avoid a fecal disaster, but our days are numbered.

Love Wins

Aunt Kimmy was there the day Liam was born.

I mean right there, front row seats. In fact, judging from the amount of work my OB did, Kimmy could have pinch hit while the doc went for coffee.
She was there, eager, to babysit whenever I needed a break or just a shower. She called him her sweet angel boy because when she was with Liam his colic magically subsided. Hand to God. Only now is it clear that that was a tell tale sign: he cherished his time with her.

She loved him, because thats what she did; thats who she was, Love. And even though he wont remember their time together he'll feel her love for him and he will know what they shared.

"They that love beyond this world cannot be separated by it."

Love Wins.

Sweet revenge.

Scene: 7:00 am Saturday morning
Mommy wakes the sound of Liam stirring over the monitor. Mommy waits until his jibber-jabber turns to frustration because no one has come to spring him from the confines of his crib. Realizing that daddy has no intention of getting up to tend to his son, mommy rolls out of bed and staggers groggily to the nursery. Liam's grin upon seeing mommy is almost worth being woken so early. Almost. At this point Mommy has two options: take Liam downstairs to play quietly over coffee and juice or...



If mama's not happy aint nobody happy.

Homemade Haircut

Everywhere we go people always mistake Liam for a little girl. When he was a new baby I didn't mind- you really can never tell with babies and most people aren't observant enough to consider the clothing- but now that hes older, a little person, its really starting to bother me. Even after I took him to Peek-a-do to have his first haircut people still called him a her. His first cut didn't really go short enough, he still had hair over his ears and in his eyes. Although I really can't fault our hairdresser I'm just thankful we made it out of there without puncture wounds all over his scalp.
So the other day I decided to take matters into my own hands. Im convinced (if Chris ever lets me) with practice I will get better at it! I happen to think, despite the crooked bangs, that I did a great job considering I had a moving target.
Here is Liam with his new homemade haircut. He's getting very upset with me because its time to come in from our outdoor play to take a nap.

But mama, I don't wanna take a nap

what if I make this cute face, then can we go back outside?

(wait for it....)

Meltdown!

Spaghetti Dinner

Now that Liam has been going to the daycare at my gym, he's been catching all these little nasty germs that, every few weeks, turn into a runny nose or a ugly cough. Combine that with separation anxiety and squarely focusing all of his attention on walking and he doesn't have much interest in anything else, including eating.
He now turns his nose up at almost everything I put on his tray. Unless its a cookie or, apparently, spaghetti!

Off roadin' in the front yard

Hello! Long time no see! How have you been? Oh, us? we're doing good- hanging in there, you know.

So its been a while and I have a good excuse for the first few weeks: my computer was infested with this really annoying virus that crippled every program. So I dropped it off to my computer guy who then took a week and a half get around to looking at it and then took 5 minutes to fix it and then charged me 120 bucks. What a racket.
But the good news is the virus is gone. The (other) bad news is so was my itunes and all of my music and my loyalty to that particular computer guy.

Anyway, all the glitches are cleared up so we can get back to it.

We had a really bad cold snap in January and there was a week or so when it was just too cold and/or rainy for Liam to play outside for any stretch of time. But as soon and it warmed up we were outside four wheelin' up a storm!
Liam and his ATV.

Taking a break from tearing up the lawn for a photo op.

Tricky dismount.

Dead battery- a sure end to the fun... Ma where's the cord!??

The south has made mama soft.

We've been having a bit of a cold snap here and as a result Liam hasn't been afforded the ample amount of outdoor play time he's accustomed to. Instead he just stands at the window and gazes longingly out into the yard.

Its audible. The sound of my heartbreaking when he does this, its audible.

Liam's first Birthday!

Well, that's it then. My baby is one.

To celebrate this momentous occasion we invited a bunch of friends and family over to watch some football and eat chili. Not too many of our friends have children so I didn't want the party to be overwhelmingly child themed. Plus, he's only one- he doesn't get it yet. It was an intimate gathering. Mostly because I never mailed the invitations. Whoops.
We started the day off with Birthday French Toast! Which I decided would be a Flanagan Family Tradition.


Liam agrees; this will be a good tradition.

Then Liam had some milk with Grandma.

And it was time for monkey cupcakes!

We sang Happy Birthday

We made a wish and blew out the candle


Liam was a bit skeptical about getting messy

But then Daddy showed him how its done and...




Time to get cleaned up and open some presents:

And the best part of all: time to play with the presents!






Happy birthday my little one. Can we take a little more time before the next?